Thursday, January 31, 2013

Thursday Tease

Maybe I should take up line dancing.....

Friday, January 25, 2013

Friday Tease

Hope he is calling me

Monday, January 21, 2013

Passing Thoughts

Well, after nearly a month, a $2,000 repair bill, and over $300 in gas, I finally have my car back! Woohoo! It feels weird after getting use to the Yukon and the Explorer. I feels as if I'm sitting on the ground almost. I keep reaching for the gear shift on the steering column instead of the console. And the ride feels rougher than I recall. Oh well, I'm still glad to have my car back.

I've been noticing little things about my mother that disturb me slightly. It isn't anything major, just little things that may point to trouble down the road as far as her health is concerned. On the way to pick up my car, she came way too close for my comfort to rear ending two cars. Both for no apparent reason. Both were not sudden stops. There was adequate room to come to a stop or at least slow down without slamming on the brakes. We weren't really talking. She had her eyes on the road. Why she waited till almost upon them to hit the brakes is beyond me. Thankfully, she did and there were no accidents this time. I've also noticed that she seems to have trouble staying between the lines. She tends to drift back and forth a lot. Almost to the point that I'm afraid she will run off the road. Again, so far she hasn't, at least while I've been in the car. Also, not that her house has become a pig sty, but she isn't keeping it as spotless as she once did. I've noticed spiderwebs and dust bunnies here and there. Most of that I've chalked up lately to her injured shoulder, so I'm only making mental notes of it, instead of saying anything to her. I know she values her independence and I wouldn't want anything to take that from her. The fall last month shook her confidence enough. But I am watching and making mental notes. She turns 74 this year and her health could be a little better, but otherwise, she is fit for her age. I'm just concerned.

I had an internet interview for a local Cadillac dealership. I've never done one that required video responses before, so it was interesting. I hate the way I sound recorded. I think I looked horrible and sounded even worse. I didn't have a webcam so after work, I went to Tommy's and used his. He said he thought I did very well on my responses. I just hope they think I did a great job on my responses! I'd love to make more money. I need to make more money! Hopefully, I will hear something positive by the middle of the week or so. Wish me luck!

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Your Love

I swim,
I crawl,
I elbow,
through the engulfing darkness called my life

I fight for what I believe in
I fight for what I want
a better me,
a better life
My battle cry of love, liberty, hope

I fight against the despair
the overwhelming sadness of a life gone awry
I languish,
I flounder

But ...
I don't give up
I won't give up
I can't give up

I can't do it without you
My rock,
My foundation
You give me strength
You give me shelter
You give me hope
You give me love

That is all  I need....
Your love.

Monday, January 14, 2013

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Wednesday Tease

My Goal

I'm hoping to look like this fella
after about 6 months of the gym!

More Stuff

This new year feels a lot like the old one. Of course only 9 days in to it, there is ample time for it to change.

I spoke with the mechanic yesterday about the car. Yep, the pistons are warped. Figures. So it will be $2,000 bucks to fix. Thankfully my mother said she would pay it and I could just make payments to her. I honestly don't know what I would do without her! It hurts to have her to pay though, so any money not going to bills will be going to her. I just hope I can continue to make payments on my jewelry at the pawn shop. All I can do is my best. Let things fall where they may. Nothing more I can do about it.

On the work front, I'm being moved from the sales floor to the support team. It feels like a demotion almost. I'll lose my full time status and my benefits as well. I have mixed feeling about it. I do think I will be happier on the support team than sales as it is more suited to my talents. It also has a fixed schedule. No weird shifts and coming and going times. No nights and no weekends! I keep my same salary. I'm looking at it as an opportunity. With a set schedule, I can may find another part time job or even return to school to further me along a career path. And certainly have more time to search for a better full time job. Like I said, mixed blessing. I haven't told my mother yet as I don't want her to worry and secondly, they haven't given me a date for it change yet. All I know is it will be some time after inventory, which is the 12th and the 13th. So wish me luck.....

My mother did receive an offer on the old place. She refused it. Can't say I blame her. It was low balled pretty bad. The tax value is $615,000. The old asking price was $550,000. It is currently listed at $395,000. They offered $325,000. So, unless they make a better counter offer, they are out of the running. Thankfully there is still two other potential buyers. One of which just sold their home and hopefully will make an offer shortly, since that is what they were waiting on. So now some more waiting.....

The car ordeal and ensuing expenses threw me for a loop. I was really struggling with things as it were and guess that was the tipping point. I was very depressed for about a week. I didn't go the the gym at all. Partly because I was depressed and just not in the mood, but also driving my sister's Yukon and my mother's Explorer just takes too much freaking gas. Between the 2 vehicles and towing, I've spent $300 much for saving my overtime pay or taking care of anything else I had hoped to do. Like new eyeglasses or tires for the car, much less getting any jewelry out of pawn. Somehow, I'll find away to get a new set of tires, hopefully that doesn't involve my mother. As for the eyeglasses, luckily, Tommy's prescription is perfect for me. I'm hoping at some point maybe I can borrow his, take them to a Lenscrafters, copy the prescription and have them placed in my old frames. It would be cheaper, if they can do that. I'll check into it a little later when all the car crap is out of the way.

At least now my head is cleared somewhat and I'm thinking clearly about what needs to be done. I'm back at the gym again which helps a lot with keeping the cobwebs at bay. Now to just get moving on updating the resume and polishing my interviewing skills.....2013 better be good to me!

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Catching Up

Here is some of the things going on with me.....

Two days before Christmas, the timing belt on my car decided to break on my way home after working a 10 hour day. Thankfully, I was only about a mile from home. A tow truck was called and delivered the car to a repair shop. Of course, they were closed the entire week of Christmas up to January 2nd. So it was towed to another local shop that opened the Wednesday after Christmas. It is uncertain if the pistons were warped or not when it broke. So now, once that is replaced and the engine back together, they will be checked to see if they were damaged and need to be repaired. I've been driving my mother's car and my sister's, which I picked up on Christmas day and drove back. Alternating back and forth if my mother doesn't need to go anywhere. So far, the big Yukon of my sister's has cost me $85 in gas for about 4 days of driving. My mother's has cost me $35 and I had filled my car up with $37 in gas, plus the two towing charges of $100. Guess where my overtime earnings went?

Also on Christmas day, I left early from my sister's since I had to be at work at 645 am for the first of 3 more 10 hour days at work. My mother fell down the basement stairs, missing the last 6 steps and landing hard on her right shoulder. She is bruised and in an arm sling for a separated shoulder bone. Thankfully, nothing is broken, but the bruises are almost neon yellow they are so bad. She hit the corner of the stairs pretty bad. A few inches higher she would have broken a rib or two, a couple lower, she would have broken her hip. She has been in some pain with the shoulder and tries to rest as much as possible. Nothing but time will heal that.

Obviously, I didn't make it to the Midnight Mass with Tommy after my car died. I hated to miss it but just couldn't make it without transportation. Maybe next year. I did go to the service with my mother after getting up at 330 am to go to the gym and working a 10 hour day. Somehow, I managed to stay awake through the hour and half service without falling asleep.

My favorite cousin lost her husband Wednesday night to lung cancer. After surgery and chemo treatments, he was released into Hospice care Monday. She is handling it well so far. I'm sure it will sink in after a few days. I remember their wedding as a youngster. It was the first I ever attended. Funeral arrangements haven't been made yet. I hope I can make it depending on my schedule at work.

Since September, I've been without running water at home. The leak I had was bad enough to run the water bill up over $400. Even with me turning the water on and off as needed, it was just too high to pay. I haven't told my mother, nor will I anytime soon, especially with the car repair looming and her property taxes due. The side benefit of  joining the gym is showers and toilets. Other times, a friend of mine since middle school, that is local, has given me the key to his house to use whenever I need to. Bless his heart. He has no idea how much that helps. I fill gallon jugs for water for Izzy to drink. I do laundry at my mother's when  I get the chance. I fibbed and told her my washer wasn't working. I bring the damp clothes home to dry as to not run her power bill up. It's more of an inconvenience than anything. It requires planning but manageable.

I had planned on using my overtime to finally get my jewelry out of the pawn shop. Guess that isn't gonna happen......

So now y'all up to speed......

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