Christmas Musings

I remember growing up the anticipation leading up to Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. It was a wonderful time to be a kid. I remember not being that shocked or disappointed that there really wasn't a Santa. I recall many gifts from parents and grandparents that I adored. Funny, I don't recall ever being after the latest and greatest toy of season. I was always happy with whatever I got. I'm still that way. Any time someone ask me what I want, I say nothing and I really mean it. I have enough stuff. Enough clothes, of all sizes, enough knick knacks to fill a couple of houses. I don't need any more. I will usually relent when pushed and just say wine and/or money. There never seems to be enough of either of those here. Maybe it's the 22 years in retail and being assaulted earlier every year with Christmas music and decorations in the workplace for 8 hours or more. Maybe it is the over spending I see this time of the year or the horror stories of shopping excursions gone bad. Maybe I'm just jaded and cynical in my middle age. But Christmas seems more of a chore and less joyful than it did in my 30's or before. It is always a hassle to pick the right gift, or find a way to afford something that no one in my family really needs. The last few years I've stopped decorating. It is more trouble than it is worth to me. I have to move Hell and half of Georgia to make room for the tree. I'm rarely home long enough to enjoy it. I don't have company over that would see or appreciate it. And the dog really don't care one way or the other. So why bother? Don't get me wrong, I love the festive lights and the shiny, sparkly ornaments. I'm happy others enjoy it. Yeah, for them. To me it is a paid day off. As far as the religion part goes, I don't buy into it wholeheartedly. It seems all the shopping and decorating and overspending has really upsurped the supposed meaning of the holiday. I'd rather hang with family and friends on this day, with the twinkling lights, good food and drinks and just enjoy the company. I like it more for that, than a fairytale birth. I partake begrudgingly with the family because they are all about that stuff. And I would never hear the end of it if I missed it. I sit and watch, oh and awe appropriately and count the minutes till I can gracefully leave. This year at work I went all season and didn't wish a single customer Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays. If they wished it upon me, I responded back with a simple, "you too!" and left it at that. When I move into a larger house, whenever that may be, I will put up a tree and lights because I enjoy that part of it. I will entertain friends with seasonal music, twinkling lights and good alcoholic beverages. I will still buy gifts for family because it is expected. But I don't have to go hog wild about. I'll reflect quietly to myself and wonder why I can't keep the decorations up year round and start thinking about the New Year.