Inward March

I think too much and act too little. I spend way too much time on the computer and not enough time in the real world, doing real things, with real people. I'm not sure how this habit developed. I think it was the first time either my DVD player or my TV stopped working. I use to get up and exercise every morning. That was how I got into such fantastic shape the first time. I use to have friends to hang out with, go places with, do things with. Of course I had the money to do that, now I don't. I'm not exactly sure how my life and my body got into such sad shape. I hate living in the past, though I seem to make comparisons very frequently to the "good old days". I think it keeps me from moving forward. Just like all the time spent on the internet. I will say this about the computer and the internet, I've met, reconnected, and learned a lot because of it. However the fact remains, it consumes way too much of my time. I'm so tempted to reactivate my Facebook account because I'm bored. I had considered working out tonight, but at this late hour, I'd never get to sleep. I'm bored with browsing profiles on various website trying to meet someone. I've grown to dislike the casual hookups over the years and would really like to have some meaningful connection with someone first. I had thought about throwing caution to the wind and spending some money on a night out, but realize I would have to ask my mother for money which I don't want to do. More so than stay home on the computer. I realize one day off of Facebook and one day limiting my time on "other" sites isn't gonna break the habit. Tonight will be rough. Tomorrow as well. But I will eventually get the hang of it and find other things to occupy my time. To be continued....