Reflection of a Life That Use to be

As the end nears, I wanted to reflect on my life in 2008.

The year started off rough with my grandfather recovering from a broken hip. In January, I had to let my the car I purchased in May go back. I could no longer afford the payments. Thanks to my father's generosity, it was a surprisingly quick transition into another he had bought for me. Finding a job in March, after losing one in December, I was faced with giving it up in less than three weeks of starting to help care for for my grandfather. As he slowly declined in health, my mother and I looked after him. It took a physical and mental toll on both of us. Neither of us, despite the hardship, would have missed that time spent with him in the final months on this earth. He passed away July 5, 2008, just shy of his 91st birthday on July 9th.

Family members celebrated birthdays, just as in any year. School stopped and started for the kids and myself. The exception being the kids all passed their classes and I failed in mine for the first time ever. My grandfather's estate was settled and my parents begin renovations on his former home of 37 years. We made plans to start construction on my house on 2.8 acres of land he and my grandmother gave me 20 years ago. My parents had all but stopped visiting the lake house in 2008, but my sister has enjoyed it. There were the ordinary things of trips to the grocery store, video stores, errands to run. My father finally had prostate surgery before Christmas and recovered quickly, without complications.

The year was overhung with clouds of sadness. A dreariness that still lingers even today as it ends. Yes, it had both it's ordinary and extraordinary moments. The loss, the gains still haven't balanced themselves out yet. I'm not sure they ever will. Even in my darkest hours, I had faith that it will get better. I still do. As the calender flips to a new year, new hope arises. I have goals and plans to tend to for the coming year. I still have my health, my family, my dog, my classes and my medication. And my great blogger buddies. It will be a glorious New Year!